Getting Back into the Swing of This

Well its been a really long time since I've posted on this or have even been on/read some of my other posts (about a little over 2 years). And I have to say that I think making this blog was an idea made in a twisted setting but was a good idea nonetheless. I think that blogs are a great way to just share your opinion or get your thoughts together. That's my plan. To organize my thoughts. Because sometimes things just get soo crazy in my head i need  outlet besides gossip to release my thoughts into. Haha first off i have to say that I've definitely have matured from my previous posts. They are result of freshie feelings and experiences. The title was also an ode to drinking and having fun. But now i think that it can be seen as more as fact of life. Life sometimes gets twisted and messed up and not what one expects or even wanted, but we all survive by moving on from those things or working with them. So I think the title is still okay. This post is more of a recap into what has been going on as well as me getting back to writing. Hmm since its February and valentines day is during this month i think Ill do a mini spiel on love. 

I for one don't think that love sucks or that it stinks, but that it is hard work (that's why i kinda shy away form it). That love takes the effort of both people involved and their desire to stay in whatever relationship they have. I heard this really cool quote from this guy on millionaire matchmaker and it goes:

"Don't pray that god sends you love, pray that you'll be ready when it appears"

I love this quote because i totally agree. I feel like love finds you sometimes and we're not ready or recognize that its there for us. And i think that being ready and recognizing it are too really hard things to do. I can tell you now that I cant do or I'm not either of those things. But it is said that there is a learning curve to life and im totally riding that curve right now. I'm a big fan of horoscopes and mine is always telling that i need to work on myself so that I will be ready to be in a relationship and so that i can make the relationships i already have in my life successful. And i kinda agree with that. You can't have love or effective ( a non-toxic relationship starting out) love if your not ready for it or if the things that you know you do wrong in a relationship are fixed. Because if not then your creating unnecessary work to the hard work that love already is. 

Well I think that's enough for my love spiel and ill be sure to update more regurally than every 2 years

DON'T Keep it Twisted!

Go Hard and End Up Staying home part 2

Sorry for the phillosophy stuff yesterday!! But I'm back to the party story!
   So I left off with my dear friend Cougar in an intense lip-lock with this boy!! Now the interesting thing about this is that I don't even know excatly at what point they went from just being dancing partners to doing the dirty with their mouths. Actually (I can't stop with the what if questions and more phillosophicalness so please bear with me) how do people at parties transition from just dancing to making out, to i'll meet you in your room in ten minutes, please be naked!? that is very puzzling to me but I'm digressing from the story. So yeah this guy was basically trying to explore Cougar's tonseils (I support random making out so I was like go girl). I kept dancing but kept looking over and checking on the progress of Cougar's makeout session. Then out of nowhere she ended up on the wall with this guy! And they were going at it ( ya dig?)! But at the sametime I didnt realize that G-Unit was making her way towards being in the situation as Cougar (don't really know if G-Unit's guy was hott, because frankly I couldnt see him that well. I mean we were at a place called the cave so I wouldnt have expected visibility to be good). I turn to my right and I see that she's attached at the butt to this guy and seemed to be really enjoying herself! So then it became like I was a tennis match. Cougar would start removing her guy's clothes to my left, and then G-Unit would start makingout even harder than Cougar had with her guy. It was almost like they were competing to see who would end upstaris with their guy first and I found all of this insanely entertaining (I was still dancing with Goose this whole time! I really meant that I monopolized his time). Then the tennis match ended with Cougar running away from her guy so I've named G-Unit the victor!! (it turns out that Cougar wasn't even that interested in her guy but she just so happend to be very twisted so that's why she was making out). G-Unit was totally interested in her guy and proceeded to get more graphic with him as time went on! You know how when you see other people doing naughty things you start to feel naughty yourself? Yep it was one of those situations! Watching so many people being naughty  made me want to go be naughty with Big Poppa! ( I restrained myself). It was getting really late and we all agreed (everyone except for G-Unit because she was still "dancing" with that guy) that it was time to depart from the Cave. Now I know that I mentioned in the first installment that drivers were not in the same timezone when came to picking us up to go to the party and this was also true for taking us home!! Not only is the cave a far walk from my residence, it's also a far snowy walk that wouldve led to my death if I had attempted to walk home! So the crew had to wait and wait and wait for a ride!! There definently needs to be a better system when it comes to sober drivers because people were cutting us in line to get rides and it was pure chaos!! Thank god Flops called his friend who came and picked us up!! We all pilled into the car and I ended up in the trunk (which was fine because I had a blankek :p )! When we finally arrived home it was like 3 in the morning!! So course being who we are we stayed up even later and woke up late the next day.
  I'm guessing that the moral or the lesson you should be learning from this tale is that if you to party at the cave and you go all out and party really hard! your not gonna be able to move the next day hence why we didn't go out on Saturday!!


DON'T Keep it Twisted!

I'm Obviously High Because I Just Called Myself Socrates

Now I know that the title of this post is shocking because everyone was expecting part 2 of Go Hard or End Up Staying Home. But I'm feeling really philosophical right now and I just have to get this off my chest. Then again knowing myself, this will probably end up being a series of posts because I'm always feeling really philosophical. So I guess the topic for right now is communication:
      I think that communication with other people is one of the hardest things that human beings use. It's just so complex and has so many levels to it, because there are so many factors that effect how people know how to communicate. I know for me personally when I'm angry initially I don't like to talk. I just need time to get over my anger before I can really address the problem or the reason why I'm mad because otherwise I'm too hotheaded and will say a whole bunch of things I don't mean. And meaning things brings up another (I guess a section?) of communication that I believe causes problems. What do people mean when they say the things they say? I'm completely positive that every single person does not view conversations the same way. And since they don't how does one convey what they mean when there seems to be some sort of barrier (or semipermeable membrane! haha I'm feeling in the bio mood) preventing the person they're talking to from understanding. This is (i'm guessing) is the main reason that I feel like I had to make this point! I tried to convey my feelings (which is not something that I like to do usually because people don't understand :p ) and I felt as if I wasn't even being heard!! ( I know damn well not to do that again). I don't know if what I was saying didn't make sense or if they took my words for a different meaning. But the conversation didn't work and I had to get out of it. I try so hard to be a good conversationalist and understand that the world isn't linear and try to see all the sides to every story when I'm listening to people (Though I know i'm not close to perfect hence the word try). I also try to be really honest when the person needs me to be or optimistic or realistic or whatever. But I literally feel emotional-wise and conversation-wise that I give soooo much and everyone takes and takes!! Yet when it;s really important and I need to take from someone I never seem to get what I need and that's so frustrating for me!! I'm a bottler (this means that I bottle my feelings up alot) so when this happens I just bottle up my feelings and I know it's not healthy. I feel as if one day i'm going to explode!! Even though I'm a bottler I still like to at least attempt to talk things out about most stuff ( i also bottle my feelings up about certain things for another reason but thats a different philosophical conversation all together).  I believe that talking and conversations are too important for their to be a barrier. Wait I've been sidetracked I also had another point lol! Where we come from and how we group up effects us in EVERY way (especially conversations). They way I speak is a reflection of how my parents speak with my own special twist on it! I feel like people's backgrounds are another barrier because they haven't seen what you've seen and they haven't lived through what you lived through so they couldn't possibly know everything you know when it comes to conversations, and frankly that pisses me off emensely! Like I said before I try to be a very understanding person (though I don't always succeed) but sometimes I get angry when I try to understand other people and I feel like i don't get the same treatmeant! But I also think that I'm angry because I dont know what the other person is feeling and (their probally trying to sincere) it's really hard to have a conversation when I have my own opinions and feelings and not knowing theirs. I'm not a perfect human and I put a damn good effort into trying to regulate myself and put myself on the same level as the people I'm communicating with, but I know i'm not very good at it. lol whatever, I feel like I've divulged to much into myself to be very phillosophical!!
But part 2 of  Go Hard and end up at home is next!!!

DON'T Keep it Twisted!

Go Hard and End Up Staying home part 1

Friday night: It was a typical night and me and my good friend Kitty we're planning on going to this party at the cave (But I must admit that I was apprehensive due to the fact that their would be some people there who i have interesting situations with ). So we were dressed to kill and invited other girls from our crew: G-Unit, My-Humps, Cougar, and Giggles. Personally I felt my outfit was diving a bit into the dark side, because I had a sweater dress on with no leggings and black boots! Imagine someone just throwing on a really cute long sweater after a night of debauchery and black boots and that's what I looked like. So the party was definently a distance away from where me and the girlies reside so transportation was deff, and the lovely members of the cave were providing. But I got to admit that the drivers were definitely not on the same time schedule as everybody else! I was definently dressed for a good 2 hours before I even arrived at the cave and there is no point on looking good at home where no one can see you! Eventually a driver came to pick us up but only had room for 3 ppl (-_-)! So i decided to wait for the next ride thinking that it would come quickly to get me My-Humps and Giggles, while the other girls went to the party. That was a bad idea on my part because it took another hour (total time = 1 hour for first car + 1 hour for my car) to get picked up, but regardless of that once I got inside i found the crew and started my night right!! But of course Kitty had to point out that Big Poppa (someone who've I played with in the past, but i'll give the cover story on him in another post). Yess he was looking as hott as he always does and that did nothing good to my resolve! I decided to ignore him for a bit and just dance with my girls who were already on their way to being totally twisted if they hadn't reached that point already lol! But then Kitty decides that I should go talk to him even though I was totally content with ignoring him the whole night and it was very good idea! We started talking and I just couldn't get rid of the smile on my face (and no the smile wasnt from me having a totally twisted night). After our lovely chat my night just exploded to absolute greatness. Everyone was merry, the cups were full and bountiful, and there was not a grenade in sight (even though I danced with some boys who were so not desirable to me).
So my night was great and the fact that things between Big Poppa and me seemed good just increased it!Then  our friends Flops and Goose came to join the fun and I led them into the cave and got back to what i do best: living it up with my girls (even though I danced with Goose from the point he came in until we left. I kind a feel bad now that i look back because i monopolized the time that he could have been hooking up with some bimbo but i'll make it up to him!!!). Now at this point in the night things got interesting. I was just having a good ole time dancing with Goose when I see Cougar and some dude in and intense lip-lock!!
haha sorry to leave this at a cliffhanger but i'm about to pass out and i have a life meaning there's stuff that need gets done by me tomorrow!


DON'T Keep it twisted!