I'm Obviously High Because I Just Called Myself Socrates

Now I know that the title of this post is shocking because everyone was expecting part 2 of Go Hard or End Up Staying Home. But I'm feeling really philosophical right now and I just have to get this off my chest. Then again knowing myself, this will probably end up being a series of posts because I'm always feeling really philosophical. So I guess the topic for right now is communication:
      I think that communication with other people is one of the hardest things that human beings use. It's just so complex and has so many levels to it, because there are so many factors that effect how people know how to communicate. I know for me personally when I'm angry initially I don't like to talk. I just need time to get over my anger before I can really address the problem or the reason why I'm mad because otherwise I'm too hotheaded and will say a whole bunch of things I don't mean. And meaning things brings up another (I guess a section?) of communication that I believe causes problems. What do people mean when they say the things they say? I'm completely positive that every single person does not view conversations the same way. And since they don't how does one convey what they mean when there seems to be some sort of barrier (or semipermeable membrane! haha I'm feeling in the bio mood) preventing the person they're talking to from understanding. This is (i'm guessing) is the main reason that I feel like I had to make this point! I tried to convey my feelings (which is not something that I like to do usually because people don't understand :p ) and I felt as if I wasn't even being heard!! ( I know damn well not to do that again). I don't know if what I was saying didn't make sense or if they took my words for a different meaning. But the conversation didn't work and I had to get out of it. I try so hard to be a good conversationalist and understand that the world isn't linear and try to see all the sides to every story when I'm listening to people (Though I know i'm not close to perfect hence the word try). I also try to be really honest when the person needs me to be or optimistic or realistic or whatever. But I literally feel emotional-wise and conversation-wise that I give soooo much and everyone takes and takes!! Yet when it;s really important and I need to take from someone I never seem to get what I need and that's so frustrating for me!! I'm a bottler (this means that I bottle my feelings up alot) so when this happens I just bottle up my feelings and I know it's not healthy. I feel as if one day i'm going to explode!! Even though I'm a bottler I still like to at least attempt to talk things out about most stuff ( i also bottle my feelings up about certain things for another reason but thats a different philosophical conversation all together).  I believe that talking and conversations are too important for their to be a barrier. Wait I've been sidetracked I also had another point lol! Where we come from and how we group up effects us in EVERY way (especially conversations). They way I speak is a reflection of how my parents speak with my own special twist on it! I feel like people's backgrounds are another barrier because they haven't seen what you've seen and they haven't lived through what you lived through so they couldn't possibly know everything you know when it comes to conversations, and frankly that pisses me off emensely! Like I said before I try to be a very understanding person (though I don't always succeed) but sometimes I get angry when I try to understand other people and I feel like i don't get the same treatmeant! But I also think that I'm angry because I dont know what the other person is feeling and (their probally trying to sincere) it's really hard to have a conversation when I have my own opinions and feelings and not knowing theirs. I'm not a perfect human and I put a damn good effort into trying to regulate myself and put myself on the same level as the people I'm communicating with, but I know i'm not very good at it. lol whatever, I feel like I've divulged to much into myself to be very phillosophical!!
But part 2 of  Go Hard and end up at home is next!!!

DON'T Keep it Twisted!

Go Hard and End Up Staying home part 1

Friday night: It was a typical night and me and my good friend Kitty we're planning on going to this party at the cave (But I must admit that I was apprehensive due to the fact that their would be some people there who i have interesting situations with ). So we were dressed to kill and invited other girls from our crew: G-Unit, My-Humps, Cougar, and Giggles. Personally I felt my outfit was diving a bit into the dark side, because I had a sweater dress on with no leggings and black boots! Imagine someone just throwing on a really cute long sweater after a night of debauchery and black boots and that's what I looked like. So the party was definently a distance away from where me and the girlies reside so transportation was deff, and the lovely members of the cave were providing. But I got to admit that the drivers were definitely not on the same time schedule as everybody else! I was definently dressed for a good 2 hours before I even arrived at the cave and there is no point on looking good at home where no one can see you! Eventually a driver came to pick us up but only had room for 3 ppl (-_-)! So i decided to wait for the next ride thinking that it would come quickly to get me My-Humps and Giggles, while the other girls went to the party. That was a bad idea on my part because it took another hour (total time = 1 hour for first car + 1 hour for my car) to get picked up, but regardless of that once I got inside i found the crew and started my night right!! But of course Kitty had to point out that Big Poppa (someone who've I played with in the past, but i'll give the cover story on him in another post). Yess he was looking as hott as he always does and that did nothing good to my resolve! I decided to ignore him for a bit and just dance with my girls who were already on their way to being totally twisted if they hadn't reached that point already lol! But then Kitty decides that I should go talk to him even though I was totally content with ignoring him the whole night and it was very good idea! We started talking and I just couldn't get rid of the smile on my face (and no the smile wasnt from me having a totally twisted night). After our lovely chat my night just exploded to absolute greatness. Everyone was merry, the cups were full and bountiful, and there was not a grenade in sight (even though I danced with some boys who were so not desirable to me).
So my night was great and the fact that things between Big Poppa and me seemed good just increased it!Then  our friends Flops and Goose came to join the fun and I led them into the cave and got back to what i do best: living it up with my girls (even though I danced with Goose from the point he came in until we left. I kind a feel bad now that i look back because i monopolized the time that he could have been hooking up with some bimbo but i'll make it up to him!!!). Now at this point in the night things got interesting. I was just having a good ole time dancing with Goose when I see Cougar and some dude in and intense lip-lock!!
haha sorry to leave this at a cliffhanger but i'm about to pass out and i have a life meaning there's stuff that need gets done by me tomorrow!


DON'T Keep it twisted!